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Freethe Children

Ross Hemsworth

August 08, 2014

Genre: Pop

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About This Song


This is a co-write with the lovely Vicky Jones, for a charity in Australia, campaigning against the detention of refugee children in prison camps. The song has a big build at the end, and I suppose some would call it a 'power ballad'. I'd love to know what you all think it. Instruments all by me, vocals by Vicky.


4 Responses


Dennis Field

Ross,

Thanks for sharing this. I like the way you structured this. Starting off with the struggles the children are facing today in verse one then in verse two you show what they could be doing if everyone came together to “Free the children tonight”. This was a catchy song and had a memorable chorus very fitting for a charity.

I like the power ballad feel and the ending/build up. It feels right to me. Could even see you doing something that pulls children into that ending. Giving them a voice I suppose.  It could be a powerful effect.

My critique would be maybe in the tempo as I felt like the lyrics were always trying to catch up to the music or visa versa. Something felt slightly off with the melody primarily with the verses.

I followed along with the story, but some lines felt so abstract that I’m not sure I’d get it all if I didn’t have the lyrics to fall back on.

I really would love to see what some others think about it. If you have not already, I’d reach out to Dick, Randall and Dave and request their feedback as well as anyone else’s.

http://frettie.com/members/profile/65
http://frettie.com/members/profile/221
http://frettie.com/members/profile/42

I like where it is headed for sure and hope my two cents is helpful!

August 08, 2014

No members have liked this comment.

Ross Hemsworth

Thanks Dennis. Please bear in mind, this was a rough demo recorded in an afternoon, after a pitch from an Australian producer for the charity project. the co-writer put a vocal on it for the demo submission.  If i were producing this, i would probably have a choir of kids on the last verses and a key change.
Appreciate your review though, thank you
Ross

August 08, 2014

No members have liked this comment.

Randall Johns

Ross, I have to agree with Dennis, some of verse lines are too abstract. “Scared like the moon?” I have to be honest; I don’t know what that means. Is the moon frightened of something? I might could see, “scared BY the moon.” That’s still a little abstract, but it makes sense in that kids are easily frightened by things they don’t understand. Just a thought. What exactly is “etched on a face?” Sorrow? Desperation? Maybe, but you don’t tell us what is etched on a face. I won’t go line by line. I’m sure you get the gist of what I’m saying. I like the second verse much better. It gets the point across much better, and without sounding so dark. I get that these kids need a home, but I think you’d be better served going a little lighter on the dark imagery. Also, I don’t think it would hurt to up the tempo just a smidge, not so much that the song is no longer a ballad, but a little bit. It does seem to drag a bit. I appreciate what you are doing for a very worthwhile cause here, so I was hesitant to be honest, but I decided I’d be doing you a disservice if I just patted you on the back and said I loved everything about the song. These are my thoughts, for better or worse. Good luck with the song and especially with the cause. Kudos to you for caring.

August 08, 2014

No members have liked this comment.

Ross Hemsworth

Thanks for the comments Randall. Firstly, the lyrics were written by co-writer Vicky Jones, specifically around the spec given by the producer in Australia. I have to add, that many chart topping songs over the years have contained lyrics that don’t seem to make sense, but have a meaning to the writer or the cause.  Also, it is probably good to remember that this is just a very rough demo recorded in an afternoon in a home studio, and NOT the finished item. It may well be the case that the producer changes the tempo, or even the lyric.  Thanks for your thoughts though, I always like to hear what others have to say. 
Ross

August 09, 2014

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0

Dennis Field

Ross,

Thanks for sharing this. I like the way you structured this. Starting off with the struggles the children are facing today in verse one then in verse two you show what they could be doing if everyone came together to “Free the children tonight”. This was a catchy song and had a memorable chorus very fitting for a charity.

I like the power ballad feel and the ending/build up. It feels right to me. Could even see you doing something that pulls children into that ending. Giving them a voice I suppose.  It could be a powerful effect.

My critique would be maybe in the tempo as I felt like the lyrics were always trying to catch up to the music or visa versa. Something felt slightly off with the melody primarily with the verses.

I followed along with the story, but some lines felt so abstract that I’m not sure I’d get it all if I didn’t have the lyrics to fall back on.

I really would love to see what some others think about it. If you have not already, I’d reach out to Dick, Randall and Dave and request their feedback as well as anyone else’s.

http://frettie.com/members/profile/65
http://frettie.com/members/profile/221
http://frettie.com/members/profile/42

I like where it is headed for sure and hope my two cents is helpful!

August 08, 2014

0

Ross Hemsworth

Thanks Dennis. Please bear in mind, this was a rough demo recorded in an afternoon, after a pitch from an Australian producer for the charity project. the co-writer put a vocal on it for the demo submission.  If i were producing this, i would probably have a choir of kids on the last verses and a key change.
Appreciate your review though, thank you
Ross

August 08, 2014

0

Randall Johns

Ross, I have to agree with Dennis, some of verse lines are too abstract. “Scared like the moon?” I have to be honest; I don’t know what that means. Is the moon frightened of something? I might could see, “scared BY the moon.” That’s still a little abstract, but it makes sense in that kids are easily frightened by things they don’t understand. Just a thought. What exactly is “etched on a face?” Sorrow? Desperation? Maybe, but you don’t tell us what is etched on a face. I won’t go line by line. I’m sure you get the gist of what I’m saying. I like the second verse much better. It gets the point across much better, and without sounding so dark. I get that these kids need a home, but I think you’d be better served going a little lighter on the dark imagery. Also, I don’t think it would hurt to up the tempo just a smidge, not so much that the song is no longer a ballad, but a little bit. It does seem to drag a bit. I appreciate what you are doing for a very worthwhile cause here, so I was hesitant to be honest, but I decided I’d be doing you a disservice if I just patted you on the back and said I loved everything about the song. These are my thoughts, for better or worse. Good luck with the song and especially with the cause. Kudos to you for caring.

August 08, 2014

0

Ross Hemsworth

Thanks for the comments Randall. Firstly, the lyrics were written by co-writer Vicky Jones, specifically around the spec given by the producer in Australia. I have to add, that many chart topping songs over the years have contained lyrics that don’t seem to make sense, but have a meaning to the writer or the cause.  Also, it is probably good to remember that this is just a very rough demo recorded in an afternoon in a home studio, and NOT the finished item. It may well be the case that the producer changes the tempo, or even the lyric.  Thanks for your thoughts though, I always like to hear what others have to say. 
Ross

August 09, 2014


Freethe Children

Written by Ross Hemsworth

Free The Children (R Hemsworth/V Jones © July 2014)

Verse 1

Scared like the moon,
Burned by the day,
This hell is where they don't belong,
But closing our eyes,
With nothing to say,
They won't be what they could become,
Etched on a face,
Looked in cage,
A million prayers but they just need one,
To escape through the bars,
That block out the stars,
So don't walk away,

CHORUS
When you're coming home,
They carve in the walls,
Another night,
Nobody answered their cries,
So scared and defenceless,
So do what is right,
Free the children tonight

Verse 2

Should be climbing trees,
Running free,
Smiles so big they light the whole street,
And when coming home,
Means safe in the warm,
But these are dreams just pinned to a wall,
These colours will fade,
Fate stays the same,
Until we turn the wrong into right,
One voice in a crowd,
May not be that load,
But we can make a sound,

CHORUS

Unlock the bars that bind their freedom,
Let them breathe air that's full of hope,
'Cos children don't start war

CHORUS

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