My wife has told me for years that I have no patience, so I figured I might as well write a song about it.
Great vibe from the kickoff Marvin, i agree with Kris about saving the hook for the end of the chorus. Great melodies in both verse and chorus too. Definitely a relatable story. Keep plugging away with it and best of luck getting it into the hands of Tim, never give up on that.
All the best
September 18, 2018
Thanks Kris, Kristina and Michael! Normally I would agree with you Kris and Michael about saving the hook for the end of the chorus, but when I write I believe some songs need the hook to be both the entrance as well as the exit of the chorus. This allows the hook to be driven home three more times in the song. I felt this was one of those songs. Thanks again for listening and commenting! I appreciate it greatly!!
September 19, 2018
No members have liked this comment.
No members have liked this comment.
Marvin, I agree with you. When you have an excellent hook, as you do, and you handle it the right way, it can and maybe should come at the beginning and end of the chorus. A good example is Trace Adkins’ “You’re Gonna Miss This.” Enjoyed your song.
October 05, 2018
No members have liked this comment.
I like tis one because it is so true of life and what people experience. The music and pacing are great, but being a lyrics person, this one drew me in. Great tune!
January 24, 2020
No members have liked this comment.
You must be signed in to post feedback.
I finish everything I start
Racin' time and on the run
From early mornin’ until dark
To get it done
I get impatient waitin’ for
My work day to finally end
To hurry back through that front door
To you again
I’ve never been a patient man
Burnin’ at both ends fast as I can
But here with you when the lights are low
All I wanna do is take it slow
So every kiss you know you’re with
A patient man
I’ve got a hemi in my truck
DSL, my cell’s 4G
But even they ain’t fast enough
Some days for me
I’ve never been a patient man
Burnin’ at both ends fast as I can
But here with you when the lights are low
All I wanna do is take it slow
So every kiss you know you’re with
A patient man
All my problems melt away
My high strung world comes unwound
Every time you light that flame
Girl I slow down
I’ve never been a patient man
Burnin’ at both ends fast as I can
But here with you when the lights are low
All I wanna do is take it slow
So every kiss you know you’re with
Every everlasting kiss you know you’re with
Yeah every kiss you’re gonna know you’re with
A patient man
A patient man
1
Cool song, Marvin. I like the idea of it and you have some good stuff in your verses for the set-up. My only suggestion would be to maybe save your hook in the chorus for the very last line, that way it has more impact. So instead of having “I’ve never been a patient man…” as your first line of the chorus, maybe say something like “I’ve never been one for waiting…” or something like that, I know you can come up with something better. And that way, your hook is golden as the last line of your song, ‘cuz then it really comes home to the listener. “Good things come to those who wait…” 
Thanks for sharing this, Marvin.
September 17, 2018
1
Great vibe from the kickoff Marvin, i agree with Kris about saving the hook for the end of the chorus. Great melodies in both verse and chorus too. Definitely a relatable story. Keep plugging away with it and best of luck getting it into the hands of Tim, never give up on that.
All the best
September 18, 2018
0
Thanks Kris, Kristina and Michael! Normally I would agree with you Kris and Michael about saving the hook for the end of the chorus, but when I write I believe some songs need the hook to be both the entrance as well as the exit of the chorus. This allows the hook to be driven home three more times in the song. I felt this was one of those songs. Thanks again for listening and commenting! I appreciate it greatly!!
September 19, 2018
0
Marvin, I agree with you. When you have an excellent hook, as you do, and you handle it the right way, it can and maybe should come at the beginning and end of the chorus. A good example is Trace Adkins’ “You’re Gonna Miss This.” Enjoyed your song.
October 05, 2018
0
I like tis one because it is so true of life and what people experience. The music and pacing are great, but being a lyrics person, this one drew me in. Great tune!
January 24, 2020
Do you want to have this song reviewed by an industry professional or a hit songwriter? Click on any of the professionals below to purchase your review.
Brent Baxter:
Pro Songwriter
$25.00/Song
Sam & Becca Mizell:
Hit Songwriters
$50.00/Song
Tell your peers about professional song reviews on Songwriting Pro.
×
Kris Krumal
Cool song, Marvin. I like the idea of it and you have some good stuff in your verses for the set-up. My only suggestion would be to maybe save your hook in the chorus for the very last line, that way it has more impact. So instead of having “I’ve never been a patient man…” as your first line of the chorus, maybe say something like “I’ve never been one for waiting…” or something like that, I know you can come up with something better. And that way, your hook is golden as the last line of your song, ‘cuz then it really comes home to the listener. “Good things come to those who wait…”
Thanks for sharing this, Marvin.
September 17, 2018