I was sitting one day thinking about how when bad things happen in the world, how does "God" determine who survives tragedy or not. That is where this idea originated from. I just penned it quick and recorded it fast to get your thoughts.
It is rough, but I am curious on what you guys think about the chorus or lack of chorus, Is it boring? Is this song worth continuing to refine and how can I take it to the next level. I like the concept and feel it is a bit unique, but I am one person.
Thanks for this great feedback. I look forward to going back to the drawing board on some of this.
September 04, 2013
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When I get an idea for a song and start writing, I never ask the question whether the song is worth finishing. My goal is to finish the song whenever possible,
If i run out of ideas, I’ll put it on the shelf. My questions are always “what is this song supposed to be about”? Does every part of the song related to that idea? Is there more that can be said? is it complete?.
You have good ideas and good musical instincts. Nice melodic phrasing. I am not sure if I am hearing the lyrics correctly. Is it “God moves through a good ol’ boy like me?” I’d call it a chorus. It stands out from the verse, but that seems different from “how does God decide who survives a tragedy?” That’s fine too. If that is what you mean to say, then I would review the lyrics to see if they support the chorus - or were they written more for the original concept?
December 31, 2013
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Walt,
Thanks for your feedback and comments. I need to post the lyrics to this for sure. The “Chorus” actually is: “God must have been a good ol’ boy like me” playing off of the thought that good ol’ boys always stick together through the good and the bad. Good ol’ boys are always helping one another out not because they have to but because of the bond that is created.
Let me know if this helps answer the above.
December 31, 2013
No members have liked this comment.
Somehow I can’t see God as a good ol boy or as identifying with bad behavior. I see him more as a protector and would have gone with something more like, “God watches out for good ol boys like me”, or “I guess God cares about good ol boys like me”. Something like that anyway. Don’t quit on this one because it is a good concept and worth polishing.
January 11, 2014
Benny,
The idea I am trying to show is exactly what you said “God watches out for the good ole boys too. I’m trying to find that balance, that doesn’t put God in bad light, but that because of him, the good ole boy can live on the edge every now and then.
Maybe it is more like you said, Dog watches our for good ol boys like me.”
I really appreciate the help and support for the concept. Going to keep working on this one!
January 11, 2014
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You already got some great feedback. I agree with Sarah’s comments wholeheartedly. I also think’s Benny’s comment about the wording in the chorus is strong input. I guess the only thing I might offer is that you have a “drinking verse” and a “jail verse” and then in your bridge you reference drinking and saying the wrong thing to a girl. The “wrong thing to a girl” line comes out of left field with no context. I’ve been encouraged (in the NSAI chapter) to make the story flow and not throw in something out of thin air which doesn’t seem to relate to anything else in the song. (Wow - that’s a long sentence.) Keep working this one - great potential.
January 12, 2014
Thanks Dick for the feedback. Very great point on how the line in the bridge about a girl leaving is pretty random. Thanks for also validating that there is something here to keep working on.
January 12, 2014
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I woke up in the morning, sweating like a dog.
Crawled my onto the bathroom floor.
I looked in the mirror and tried to recall, how I made it this far.
90 miles and hour, on a dirt road I didn't know.
Up ahead a curve I never saw..
God must have been a good ole boy like me
God must have been a good ole boy like me
I spent some time in the country jail.
Over a few packs of named brand cigarettes.
And I met my son for the first time.
Looking through the glass window pane ya
I don't know how I got out alive.
I thank the Lord now every day…
God must have been a good ole boy like me
God must have been a good ole boy like me
When I have to much to drink, he drives me home.
When I say the wrong things, he brings that girl back to me…
God must have been a good ole boy like me
God must have been a good ole boy like me
Like me…..
1
You uploaded a song!! :D
I really like the concept! A few thoughts as I’m listening through the first time:
Realy dig the verses. Simple chords, moves it along nicely, oesn’t distract, lets your lyrics shine.
Prechorus - I kind of wanted the pre-chorus melody to go up instead of down. The verse melody is so mellow and conversational, it feels like that pre-chorus should life up into the chorus, instead of dropping back down into the swing of the verse, if that makes sense.
Chorus - Ain’t no shame in having a chorus with the same line repeated! Although I would suggest another part to it with some new chords - So you have “God must have been a good ol boy like me/God must have been a good ol’ boy like me/anotherlinehere/God must have been a good ol’ boy like me”. That way your chorus and your verse are further differentiated.
“I met my son for the first time” - what a powerful line!! I feel like you could write a whole verse around this! Or song for that matter! Great line, man.
Just some thoughts. Great to see you posting music up here!! <3
September 04, 2013
0
Thanks for this great feedback. I look forward to going back to the drawing board on some of this.
September 04, 2013
0
When I get an idea for a song and start writing, I never ask the question whether the song is worth finishing. My goal is to finish the song whenever possible,
If i run out of ideas, I’ll put it on the shelf. My questions are always “what is this song supposed to be about”? Does every part of the song related to that idea? Is there more that can be said? is it complete?.
You have good ideas and good musical instincts. Nice melodic phrasing. I am not sure if I am hearing the lyrics correctly. Is it “God moves through a good ol’ boy like me?” I’d call it a chorus. It stands out from the verse, but that seems different from “how does God decide who survives a tragedy?” That’s fine too. If that is what you mean to say, then I would review the lyrics to see if they support the chorus - or were they written more for the original concept?
December 31, 2013
0
Walt,
Thanks for your feedback and comments. I need to post the lyrics to this for sure. The “Chorus” actually is: “God must have been a good ol’ boy like me” playing off of the thought that good ol’ boys always stick together through the good and the bad. Good ol’ boys are always helping one another out not because they have to but because of the bond that is created.
Let me know if this helps answer the above.
December 31, 2013
1
Somehow I can’t see God as a good ol boy or as identifying with bad behavior. I see him more as a protector and would have gone with something more like, “God watches out for good ol boys like me”, or “I guess God cares about good ol boys like me”. Something like that anyway. Don’t quit on this one because it is a good concept and worth polishing.
January 11, 2014
0
Benny,
The idea I am trying to show is exactly what you said “God watches out for the good ole boys too. I’m trying to find that balance, that doesn’t put God in bad light, but that because of him, the good ole boy can live on the edge every now and then.
Maybe it is more like you said, Dog watches our for good ol boys like me.”
I really appreciate the help and support for the concept. Going to keep working on this one!
January 11, 2014
1
You already got some great feedback. I agree with Sarah’s comments wholeheartedly. I also think’s Benny’s comment about the wording in the chorus is strong input. I guess the only thing I might offer is that you have a “drinking verse” and a “jail verse” and then in your bridge you reference drinking and saying the wrong thing to a girl. The “wrong thing to a girl” line comes out of left field with no context. I’ve been encouraged (in the NSAI chapter) to make the story flow and not throw in something out of thin air which doesn’t seem to relate to anything else in the song. (Wow - that’s a long sentence.) Keep working this one - great potential.
January 12, 2014
0
Thanks Dick for the feedback. Very great point on how the line in the bridge about a girl leaving is pretty random. Thanks for also validating that there is something here to keep working on.
January 12, 2014
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Sarah Spencer
You uploaded a song!! :D
I really like the concept! A few thoughts as I’m listening through the first time:
Realy dig the verses. Simple chords, moves it along nicely, oesn’t distract, lets your lyrics shine.
Prechorus - I kind of wanted the pre-chorus melody to go up instead of down. The verse melody is so mellow and conversational, it feels like that pre-chorus should life up into the chorus, instead of dropping back down into the swing of the verse, if that makes sense.
Chorus - Ain’t no shame in having a chorus with the same line repeated! Although I would suggest another part to it with some new chords - So you have “God must have been a good ol boy like me/God must have been a good ol’ boy like me/anotherlinehere/God must have been a good ol’ boy like me”. That way your chorus and your verse are further differentiated.
“I met my son for the first time” - what a powerful line!! I feel like you could write a whole verse around this! Or song for that matter! Great line, man.
Just some thoughts. Great to see you posting music up here!! <3
September 04, 2013